ANDREW RECEIVES FATAL WEDGIE
From Modbury Heights:Andrew Kwasny was wondering
down a down town street buying some milk for his
mum from the deli, until unsuspectively three
gangsters come out and give him a wedgie each.
The gangsters ran away with Andrew’s $1.40
for the milk and Andrew was stranded with his
underpants firmly up his backside.
Hours later, Andrew was in hospital with anal
infestations, his doctor saying he can’t sit
down for a week.
Now what’s the moral here? Never buy milk
for your mum. |
Saturn
running hot with 8 new titles
|
Sega are just the best, as we all
know, but with Sega set to bring out
eight new titles for their Saturn
machine, their looking at increasing
their lead in the market place. First is
Sonic Jam, a retro pack collection
containing Sonic 1, 2, 3 and Sonic and
Knuckles. But, most impressive would have
to be the incredible Sonic World.
Featuring Mario 64 style graphics with no
glitching or clipping whatso ever.
Next is Resident Evil. It might be 18
months later than the PlayStation
version, but its like WAAAAYYYYYY better!
It’s a gory (no, make that VERY
gory) 3D shooting type game, and has
enhanced modes not seen in thePSX
version!
Next we have Sega Touring Car
Championship. Sega Rally was always the
king of racing games (on ANY console)
until now. Sega touring Car has heaps
faster graphics, more advanced Artificial
Intelligence and has heaps more detail on
the computer cars. Also, it’s going
to feature a rear view mirror and a
Saturn only track! |
|
Next we have Duke Nukem 3d. On the internet on
Saturn World, it got 10 out of 10 and rightly
so.This game has everything that made the PC
version a classic and more! It has heaps improved
light sourcing and when you fire a gun, your
surrounded i n a yellow glow. Similar things
happen with the freeze ray, except it has blue
light.
It also allows Netlink support, and has a cool
mini sub game called Death Tank 2. This game is
essential.
Continuing on the 3D shoot
‘em up genre is Quake. Hailed as the best PC
game in ever (and that includes Doom) makes it to
the Saturn EXCLUSIVELY! There will be no
PlayStation version of ID’s master piece!
Plus Sonic R, WipEout 2097, Last Bronx and Marvel
Super Heroes are epic making!
|
Today’s weather : Super hot-
47 degrees!!!